For the Ancestors: 4 Ways to Pay Homage

Happy Black History Month, fam! If you’re looking for a way to honor your ancestors, then this might be a perfect time. (Although, you don’t need an excuse to pay homage and thank them for their guidance and protection.) 

Whether you know it or not, you already have a connection with your ancestors. Your generational bonds were established before anyone passed away (and before you were born). You might find yourself drawn to practices and hobbies from your ancestral line or habitually hittin’ someone with a side-eye the way your great-auntie did. Although the bond is there, establishing or re-establishing relationships with ancestors is a way to acknowledge them, invite them to walk with you, and give gratitude for their presence in your life. (Gratitude is the keyword here—please don’t go asking for favors and blessings if you haven’t established relationships and given thanks.)  

First Thing’s First

Now before we start, we gotta let it be known that every ancestor you have may not be open to working with you (and you might not be open to working with them). Generational trauma is real and we know all too well that every person doesn’t have your best interest at heart—including some family members. For example, some Black folks might have white ancestors who were oppressors and others might have ancestors who were abusers. Some ancestors simply might not wanna be bothered. Use your intuition and discernment when connecting with your ancestors. They are spirits after all, and working with spirits should not be taken lightly. 

If you’re new to ancestral veneration, we suggest starting with your ancestors you had a trusted connection with on this plane, like a passed on grandparent or uncle. You can also proclaim protection phrases before certain rituals to only invite the presence of loving ancestors. Some of our favorites are: “Ancestors who guide and love me,” and “Ancestors here for my highest good.” 

Now that we got that out the way, here are some simple practices you can incorporate and make your own to uplift your ancestors: 

Maintain Their Resting Places

Visiting and maintaining resting places is a simple, yet meaningful way to honor recent ancestors. Most of y’all might already be doing this, but it doesn’t have to be regulated to certain dates like birthdays or anniversaries. Make an intentional practice to regularly visit and clean the gravesites of your passed on loved ones. Decorate their resting spots with flowers or some of their favorite things. While you’re there, spend quality time with them. Did they love books? Read a couple of chapters of a book they might enjoy. Were they always dancing? Play music as you clean their space. Make your time with them special and specific with physical and emotional offerings. 

P.S. This goes for ancestors who aren’t necessarily buried, too. If you know where their remains lay, then go to that space and connect with them. 

Set Up An Altar

Use your altar as a sacred space for your ancestors and ancestral rituals. If you already have an altar, you can add some of your loved ones’ belongings, things that remind you of them, or their photos. (You can even have pictures of community ancestors who’ve inspired you like Toni Morrison, Harriet Tubman, or Nina Simone.) Even better, you can create an altar specifically for your ancestors. 

You can also use your altar to present offerings. For example, you could leave a glass of one of your ancestor’s favorite drinks on your altar or place fresh flowers there for them. I like to light white candles on my altar for my ancestors’ birthdays. As always, remember to respect the space you’ve designated for them by maintaining and caring for it. 

Offer Libations

If you’ve ever “poured one out” for a friend or family member who passed away, then you’ve offered libations. (See how deep our roots run? We’ve practiced ancient rituals without some of us even realizing it). Most times we honor the memory of loved ones by offering spirits (read: alcohol) to the spirits, but you can also offer other sacred liquids like tea or water. 

Offering libations can be a whole ceremony or you can make it simple by saying a message or prayer for your ancestor, then pouring your libation into the Earth. This could be their gravesite, a plant or a sacred space outside. 

When my great-grandmother passed away last month, I said a prayer to thank her for her life and bless her journey to the next realm before I poured water into a tree she led me to. Nothing too elaborate, but still beautiful (and she acknowledged, accepted, and thanked me for my offering a couple of days later). 

Simply Connect 

Sometimes the most meaningful way to pay homage to your ancestors is to simply make space for them. Practices like prayer, meditation, and journaling can be great for communicating with your ancestors. You can even ask them how they’d like to connect with you. Some of my ancient ancestors made it known that they like to speak with me through tarot and meditation, so I make time for them through those practices. Maybe one of your ancestors loved fishing, so a great way to spend time with them is to sit on the dock by yourself with the intention to connect to their spirit. 

All of the ancestors you work with will have their own ways of communicating, so pay attention to their signs and set aside time to nurture the individual relationships just like you would if they were here—because they are!